Baby Girl in her vampiress costume. She always wants to be "something dead" for Halloween.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Puberty and Punctuation
I’ve got so much that I need to write about to get everyone caught up on the past 7 months but I’ve just GOT to share Baby Girl’s most recent “adventure” first. Let me just say that if and when she ever reads this blog she will probably already have been in therapy for quite some time so I’m not very concerned about the “damage” this post might cause. Baby Girl is becoming a WOMAN……….
So, over the Summer it became very noticeable that Baby Girl’s body was starting to develop. We’ve bought the training bra in order to make sure that her new “additions” are kept in check – she hates it and won’t wear it. I believe this is because she is holding out for the “formed cup” model. That’s right – they now have bras for little people that look like the Wonder Bra with fully formed, padded cups! And we wonder why we are constantly seeing those “To Catch a Predator” shows!?!?
Anyway, about a week ago Baby Girl started complaining that she had some stuff going on “down there”. Well, being that talking about her “down there” isn’t something we normally do – I will admit I was a little uncomfortable. I took her to the doctor to rule out any medical conditions that could be associated with the symptoms she described and she came back with a clean bill of health. So, basically now I’m just screwed trying to figure out how to talk to my 9 year old, which still want’s to watch Scooby Doo all day, what is happening to her body. Like any good parent, I did my research. I got online and searched for answers and I found tons of information about talking to your daughter about puberty. I got home from work that night, went in Baby Girl’s room, sat on the side of her bed, took a deep breath and handed her a piece of paper with a web address for her to check out. I know…..I’m a chicken. Plus, I don’t know what she already knows so I don’t want to just start asking her questions for fear that I will bring up something that she’d never thought about until I opened my big mouth.
So, I sent her to www.kidhealth.org (which is a WONDERFUL site for kids to get information in their own language about all types of stuff they deal with growing up) and she started reading. The more she read the more questions she had which was kind of what I was hoping would happen. I was felling really good about how I’d handled this milestone in her life. We talked about how she needed to wear her training bra. She was disgusted to find out that she would eventually grow hair under her arms and in other areas. She seemed to begin to understand what was going on with her “down there” and the conversation started to taper off when Bean started to fuss for her dinner. I moved into the den and Baby Girl and Honey were still in the kitchen (him cooking and her reading). All of a sudden Baby Girl says, “Oh no – I’m NOT doing that!” I am horrified by this as my first thought is that I didn’t check out the website as thoroughly as I’d thought and she was now being bombarded with porn. Honey walked around so that he could see what she was looking at and said, “You’re not doing what?” “I’m NOT having this period thing!” she replied.
I started to laugh. Partly because I was relieved that she wasn’t looking at a bunch of smut and partly because I knew I was about to get to drop a bomb on her. I said, “Well, Baby Girl, you really don’t have much choice.” I explained about how that’s the way are bodies are made and how getting her period is a sign that she’s growing into a woman. Honey chimes in with, “And once you get your period you have to stay away from boys”. He is SOOO helpful with this kind of stuff. Baby Girl is adamant that she is NOT going to get her period or her question mark or semicolon for that matter and that was FINAL. I told here that she might as well get over it because it’s GOING to happen whether she likes it or not. She puts her hands on her hips and says, “So, how long is this period thing going to last?” I said, “Do you mean each time?” Her eyes got as big a saucers and she says, “What do you mean EACH TIME?!?!” I then had to explain that not only was she going to be cursed with this horrible affliction to her “down there” but that it would reoccur every month. She was not at all happy to hear this. She says, “Every month?!?! Forever?!?!” I tell her that it doesn’t last forever but it was something she was going to have to deal with for many years to come. She asked if I still had to deal with it and I told her unfortunately, yes. She rolled her eyes and said, “Oh GREAT, this thing is going to last until I’m REALLY old!” I thanked her for calling me old but reassured her that it’s really not a big deal and that when it happens we will deal with it.
She seemed to start to wrap her brain around the idea and started to loose some of the defiance and all of a sudden she began to smile. I was concerned because it was that “I’m up to something” smile. She then announces that she guesses it will be ok for her to get her period because then she won’t have to go to school. I informed her that it didn’t work that way, that she didn’t get to stay home from school because she was on her monthly cycle. To which she responded, “But you always say, ‘Unless you have a broken bone, are throwing up or bleeding you’d better get your butt out of bed and get ready for school’ and gave me the biggest “Nah” smile she could muster.
I HATE it when my words come back to bite me in the butt! So, in my future I can foresee lots of dramatic pleas to stay home due to cramps or because the only pants she has clean are white. I just know I will get a monthly call from the school to pick her up because she can never remember when she should “be prepared”. But I think my favorite step in this trip to womanhood is going to be the first time I hear that scream from the bathroom because her Kotex managed to flip sticky side up!
Oh, the joys of raising girls…..anybody looking to adopt?
So, over the Summer it became very noticeable that Baby Girl’s body was starting to develop. We’ve bought the training bra in order to make sure that her new “additions” are kept in check – she hates it and won’t wear it. I believe this is because she is holding out for the “formed cup” model. That’s right – they now have bras for little people that look like the Wonder Bra with fully formed, padded cups! And we wonder why we are constantly seeing those “To Catch a Predator” shows!?!?
Anyway, about a week ago Baby Girl started complaining that she had some stuff going on “down there”. Well, being that talking about her “down there” isn’t something we normally do – I will admit I was a little uncomfortable. I took her to the doctor to rule out any medical conditions that could be associated with the symptoms she described and she came back with a clean bill of health. So, basically now I’m just screwed trying to figure out how to talk to my 9 year old, which still want’s to watch Scooby Doo all day, what is happening to her body. Like any good parent, I did my research. I got online and searched for answers and I found tons of information about talking to your daughter about puberty. I got home from work that night, went in Baby Girl’s room, sat on the side of her bed, took a deep breath and handed her a piece of paper with a web address for her to check out. I know…..I’m a chicken. Plus, I don’t know what she already knows so I don’t want to just start asking her questions for fear that I will bring up something that she’d never thought about until I opened my big mouth.
So, I sent her to www.kidhealth.org (which is a WONDERFUL site for kids to get information in their own language about all types of stuff they deal with growing up) and she started reading. The more she read the more questions she had which was kind of what I was hoping would happen. I was felling really good about how I’d handled this milestone in her life. We talked about how she needed to wear her training bra. She was disgusted to find out that she would eventually grow hair under her arms and in other areas. She seemed to begin to understand what was going on with her “down there” and the conversation started to taper off when Bean started to fuss for her dinner. I moved into the den and Baby Girl and Honey were still in the kitchen (him cooking and her reading). All of a sudden Baby Girl says, “Oh no – I’m NOT doing that!” I am horrified by this as my first thought is that I didn’t check out the website as thoroughly as I’d thought and she was now being bombarded with porn. Honey walked around so that he could see what she was looking at and said, “You’re not doing what?” “I’m NOT having this period thing!” she replied.
I started to laugh. Partly because I was relieved that she wasn’t looking at a bunch of smut and partly because I knew I was about to get to drop a bomb on her. I said, “Well, Baby Girl, you really don’t have much choice.” I explained about how that’s the way are bodies are made and how getting her period is a sign that she’s growing into a woman. Honey chimes in with, “And once you get your period you have to stay away from boys”. He is SOOO helpful with this kind of stuff. Baby Girl is adamant that she is NOT going to get her period or her question mark or semicolon for that matter and that was FINAL. I told here that she might as well get over it because it’s GOING to happen whether she likes it or not. She puts her hands on her hips and says, “So, how long is this period thing going to last?” I said, “Do you mean each time?” Her eyes got as big a saucers and she says, “What do you mean EACH TIME?!?!” I then had to explain that not only was she going to be cursed with this horrible affliction to her “down there” but that it would reoccur every month. She was not at all happy to hear this. She says, “Every month?!?! Forever?!?!” I tell her that it doesn’t last forever but it was something she was going to have to deal with for many years to come. She asked if I still had to deal with it and I told her unfortunately, yes. She rolled her eyes and said, “Oh GREAT, this thing is going to last until I’m REALLY old!” I thanked her for calling me old but reassured her that it’s really not a big deal and that when it happens we will deal with it.
She seemed to start to wrap her brain around the idea and started to loose some of the defiance and all of a sudden she began to smile. I was concerned because it was that “I’m up to something” smile. She then announces that she guesses it will be ok for her to get her period because then she won’t have to go to school. I informed her that it didn’t work that way, that she didn’t get to stay home from school because she was on her monthly cycle. To which she responded, “But you always say, ‘Unless you have a broken bone, are throwing up or bleeding you’d better get your butt out of bed and get ready for school’ and gave me the biggest “Nah” smile she could muster.
I HATE it when my words come back to bite me in the butt! So, in my future I can foresee lots of dramatic pleas to stay home due to cramps or because the only pants she has clean are white. I just know I will get a monthly call from the school to pick her up because she can never remember when she should “be prepared”. But I think my favorite step in this trip to womanhood is going to be the first time I hear that scream from the bathroom because her Kotex managed to flip sticky side up!
Oh, the joys of raising girls…..anybody looking to adopt?
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