Paging Dr. Bean

I told you guys earlier that I babysit. Well the two boys have a tendency to be a little rambunctious (i.e. try to kill each other on a fairly regular basis). I spend a lot of my time saying things like, "no hitting...stop wrestling...don't throw your sister" it can be exhausting.

Anyway, the other day I'd made the "stop acting like crack heads" announcement about 5 times before it was time to leave for school. As the boys were putting on their shoes, Wrasslin says to Zookeeper, "you kicked me in the leg" to which Zookeeper defends with, "you punched me in the stomach"...followed by a chorus of whiny "no I didn'ts" from both boys. At this point, I'd only had ONE cup of coffee and was no longer in the mood for politically correct, socially acceptable parenting/caregiving tactics. I was not in a place where I could sit them down and lovingly express how when they fight they could hurt one another, how it's important to be sweet to your siblings and protect them not injure them. No, it was early, I was low on caffeine and "kind words". What I did was look at them both and say, "I don't care! I don't care if one of you knocks the head off the other...I warned you to stop fighting. So, when blood starts gushing from one of your bodies, don't come running to me because I will NOT give you a wash cloth, paper towel, piece of toilet paper or a bandaid...you'll just stand there bleeding till you're empty!".
As they stared at me like I'd grown three more heads, I turned on my heels to stomp off in a show of utter disgust and dang near knocked over Bean. She was standing with her hands on her hips and had a very stern look on her face. I said, "what?", in my most "don't mess with me right now" tone and she raised her eyebrows at me and says, "Momma, just because somebody doesn't listen does NOT mean you can just let them bleed to death!". I said, "put your dang shoes on and go to school"...and I went to the bathroom to laugh. I hear her telling the boys, "I know where the band aids are"...how am I supposed to keep order around here if the 6 year old undermines my authority? Oh well, off to buy band aids...

The Force is Strong in The Bean

I need to preface by letting you know that, among other things, I babysit kids (don't laugh). I have three siblings that come every morning before school and eat breakfast. The morning conversation is always interesting and usually entertaining but this particular conversation almost made me shoot coffee out of my nose.

The kids had brought donuts on this particular morning and they are all at the table bragging about how many each of them can eat. The oldest boy, Zookeeper, says he can eat 4. The middle boy, Wrasslin, says he can eat 6. The little sister, Blanket, says she can eat 200, to which Bean replies, "you can't even count to 200". Blanket says, "I can count to 10" to which Bean replies, "we'll that's not the same now is it?"

Bless Blanket's little heart, the sarcasm was lost on her but I was jumping up and down on the inside. It was at that
moment that I was sure that my baby is going to wield the sword of sarcasm with great power and that makes me very proud.

Here We Go Again...

So I've finally figured out that I can blog from my phone...woo hoo!!

A LOT has happened over the last year...My Honey is no longer my husband so his name will be changed to "NA"...Baby Girl is 15, Bug is 9 and Bean is 6 and they are all beautiful and smart!! Bean has her Momma's sense of humor and Baby Girl makes me proud with her fluency in sarcasm. Bug is growing into a beautiful young lady and I'm very grateful that her mother and I are such good friends because I will always want to be a part of her life.
I'm no longer in the corporate world but still live in my tiny town and love it! Now that I know how to do this from my phone, posts will be frequent as there is always something happening around here. You will meet new people and learn of new adventures...some at The Walmart...of course.
So buckle up folks...let the games begin!